Welcome to my new blog.  This blog is primarily about my new adventure, writing a memoir.  But since my memoir is about me and my family, of course we will feature here as well.

The book I’m writing will have a theme of Hope Deferred.  This is because, in parenting Ben, we have gotten our hopes up many times, whether for the end if chemo, a promising surgery that fails to bring the quality of life upgrade we expect, or a new health crisis, each time hope is swept away with bitter disappointment.

The conventional wisdom of the Proverbs proclaims that, “hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life”.  Indeed it is, but after years of heartsickness, our family has grown a tree of life right in the midst of our deferred hope, and my goal is to share with you our tree of life. 

Writing itself is a tree of life for me in yet another season of deferred hope and heartache.  We are presently in the process of yet another major diagnosis for Ben, and I am verklempt.  I find myself unable to speak of it without tears, so instead I write.  This writing is a catharsis of years of struggle, and my way of planting a tree if life, yet again, in the middle of a desert of despair.

Which brings me to running.  Running is my way of coping.  No matter what happens, when I run I create a space for my mind to organize all the chaos that medically complex parenting can bring, not to mention the every day twists and turns that just happen in life.  I don’t fully understand how, but I know that a long run releases beneficial brain chemicals, and it’s the best drug I could imagine.  Running is my happy pill, well, runn

So I welcome you.  I’m happy you’re here, and I hope you like it.


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